Knowledge Is Power

Archive for the ‘Hope’ Category

The Spiral Down

In Hope, Personal empowerment, Personal stories, Pharmaceuticals, Psychiatry on May 23, 2012 at 1:53 pm

A share from my Facebook page today….

I knew enough to know that what psychiatry called psychosis, paranoia and other “extreme states” were a stress response so I didn’t “buy into” those ideas…I never reported those experiences to the “providers”. What I didn’t know though…was that the “mania” was caused by the drugs they gave me for the “depression” that was caused by the stimulants they gave me for “adhd” which was actually PTSd on steriods. Learning to frame my experiences in the context of life allows me to learn the life skills to well, have a life outside of the idea that I’m broken and defective. I ended up victim to the lie of psychiatry because I believed that when I sought help to stop re creating abusive relationships in my life I was told that the problem was not that I was being abused but that I was the problem.

 The spiral down for me began when I was told that my normal reactions to being abused were a disease.

This in turn left me helpless to stop the abuse and in fact allowed it to continue and perpetuate these power/control dynamics to my children.

 We are told to “tell” when others are hurting us.

Yet when we do tell and are then told “what did you do to make them hit/hurt you”…?

Or when we are taught “there are two sides to every story so lets see what you need to do differently to MAKE the abuse and mistreatment stop”….

Not. Helpful.

At all.

 There is no negotiating with those who are hurtful.

It does make sense to put out the effort to work things out…

 But the truth of the matter is….

Is when we approach dysfunctional relationships with the tools that work in functional relationships….we often end up re-victimized because we are doing what we are told by the professionals…like…..

 ”When you ______ I feel ________ and I’d like you to do/not do ____________”.

 In healthy relationships this becomes a healthy respectful negotion; a place where ones thoughts and feelings are respected. A time where we have an opportunity to show we care by caring about each others feelings.

In dysfunction though?

The one we are asking to respect our feelings will most often turn this around and make it about you and how it is your fault they can’t change, why they are hurting you….

In the end – trying to work things out with someone who is coming from a history of dysfunction often ends up with the victim being re victimized and made responsible for the situation.

The idea that it is possible to “negotiate” with someone to stop being abusive….is absurd.

Why?

Because the issue becomes about them sidestepping the issue by somehow changing the subject, becoming defensive, argumentative…

 We often walk away wondering if WE are the crazy one.

So when we turn to a mental health system that does not acknowledge their own power plays and dysfuntion – how can we expect to get approproiate support to become healthy self empowered individudals?

The change for me came when I learned how to put my foot down about the way others were treating me while letting go of what they decided to do with the limits I was setting for myself.

Learning to say “no” is one thing.

Learning to stand my ground about no longer being mistreated another.

This – was how I finally broke free of the cycle of being that doormat that had kept me feeling “crazy” for so many years.

This – was when I finally saw that the “mental health” system….?

Is pretty much clueless about “mental health”.

Me and “PTSd”

In Hope, Personal empowerment, Personal stories, Pharmaceuticals, Psychiatry, withdrawals on May 15, 2012 at 11:32 am

I posted this at my Facebook profile page this morning….

Yesterday there was discussion around a graphic I posted that said “PTSD is a normal reaction….”. I, like many others, had came to believe that “ptsd” was something that happened “to” me. That it was a “disorder” that I’d have to live with for the rest of my life.

I was in the “care” of “mental health providers” who for 2 decades had written ptsd in my charts – but NOT ONCE was I “treated” for it. It was expected that I “had” ptsd and would have it forever.

I was given powerful mind altering drugs all those years that were effectively a chemical straight jacket, a chemical lobotomy. When I had “symptoms” I was instructed to call my doctor or therapist and THEY would do something to ease my distress.

NOT ONCE* was the idea that the “symptoms” of ptsd were a normal human response to the HORRIBLE life experiences I had survived.

In fact – the drugs and the “treatments” became ANOTHER source of trauma for me as in 2007 ANOTHER psychiatrist decided that I no longer fit the criteria for being given those drugs and forced me OFF them – in one day.

And as I started to “wake up” from this state of drug induced zombie-like existence….I realized that I had never needed the drugs and had basically experienced a chemical lobotomy that made me a docile compliant “consumer”.

Try waking up after 20 years of THAT and realizing that you had been lied to and been incapacitated by drugs – not some mysterious “disease”.

BUT – the good news is that after going through a horrendous period of withdrawal…I had my mind, my brain and my body back under my control and – I learned how to work through the past experiences so I no longer suffered from them.

The drugs? Actually made the “ptsd” worse as the side effects induced MORE ptsd type symptoms and other terrible side effects like a 60 pound weight gain – and that was used to validate that I really was “sick” AND lazy.

PTSd is a normal RESPONSE to abnormal life experiences.

I learned the emotional and cognitive SKILLS I needed to put those experiences in perspective and make them part of my memories that I no longer lived the trauma nightmare that my “providers” told me I would.

Think about it folks. It is not profitable for those who bill their time to teach us how to live beyond these symptoms. (And the truth is that most of them don’t have a clue HOW to help us because of course…they are educated by the interests that profit from our dependence on the drugs)

Residual income – almost 20 years of insurance billings – and now they no longer get that from keeping me dependent on them.

Your experiences were real. Your pain is real.

Yet – the path to emotional healing is so similar for those who have found freedom from it.

The “disorder” about PTS…is the extremes to which we go to avoid “triggered” memories. I made “order” by choosing to learn to “work through” that pain instead of continuing to avoid it.

Was it easy? HELL NO.

Was it worth it? DAMNED STRAIGHT.

*Note: in late 2007 early 2008 I had the good fortune to fall into a situation with a LMSW who had trained with Colin Ross who developed the original Trauma Model. This individual taught me the skills and shared the kind of insightful information that enabled me to empower myself to live beyond my original trauma experiences. I have used this same model and process to heal myself of the raging anger at having been brainwashed and lobotomized for over 15 years and the next 5 years of withdrawals that I have experienced….and survived. I now have made meaning of my experiences by sharing with others the path I followed to find freedom from both the original trauma of my developmental years and the secondary trauma of psychiatry and devastating and crippling “mental health” “treatment”. Find more and join my community at www.proactiveplanning.org and www.facebook.com/empoweringsolutions

You can find the individual who taught me the skills and validated my life experiences here: www.traumarevolution.com

The Empathic Civilisation: the human family – Beyond Meds

In Hope on February 23, 2012 at 1:57 pm

I”m tellin’ ya….Gianna over at Beyond Meds has it going on:)

Another great topic and post….The Empathic Civilisation: the human family – Beyond Meds.

via The Empathic Civilisation: the human family – Beyond Meds.

a resource for survivors of sexual abuse

In Hope, Personal empowerment on January 20, 2012 at 9:08 pm

The Guilt Bucket « a new place to stand is a great resource for anyone looking for more information about how to create and live an empowered life by learing how to take back their power.

This blog is a new resource for survivors of sexual abuse who have wondered – perhaps like I did for many years – just when will I have finally had enought therapy to consider myself “healed”?

And the answer for me?

Was none.

I’m not being sarcastic or snotty here – the truth is that in nearly 2 decades…

thats T W E N T Y years

I received zilch in education or information how to heal from the secret wounds of sexual abuse.

In fact I got worse while under the care of traditional “therapies” and found freedom only after (miraculously) falling into a situation with another trauma survivor who shared the light she found – with me.

But hey…if traditional therapy is working for you….go for it and my hat is off to you if you can make that work.

But

if you are done with therapies that promise positive results but you’ve not seen progress

and its been awhile

this might be a blog worth checking out.

For survivors of sexual abuse: a new place to stand.

For anyone needing education or information on “Trauma Informed Care” for yourself or your providers….this is one of the best places out there: www.traumarevolution.com

 

Begin With Kindness To Yourself – Pema Chodran

In Hope, Personal empowerment on January 19, 2012 at 12:23 pm

I recieved notes from the work of Pema Chodran, a buddist nun and today wanted to share this one with you:

We are all in this together. So when you realize that you’re talking to yourself, label it “thinking” and notice your tone of voice. Let it be compassionate and gentle and humorous. Then you’ll be changing old stuck patterns that are shared by the whole human race. Compassion for others begins with kindness to ourselves.

In the context of psychiatry we are taught and conditioned to pathologize every thing – E V E R Y thing…about ourselves.

Especially the things that make us…us.

Our thoughts, beliefs, feelings and every choice we make is on the block for disection as we reveal our inner demons to the “professionals”.

Yet they don’t take that information that we freely shared because we trusted them to guide us to well being.

They use this inormation to shape us and groom us to believe that everything about us from the inside out is “sick”.

So today – try what Pema suggests.

Compassion.

Compassion for your own pain and the struggles you have faced and overcome.

And know – deep within your being that you are not sick and mostly….

you are enough.

Then….just go rock your own world:)

The science behind how emotional distress causes psychosis | Wellness Wordworks

In Hope, Personal empowerment on January 13, 2012 at 7:06 pm

Read up on the science behind psychosis.

By Advocate Corinna West: The science behind how emotional distress causes psychosis | Wellness Wordworks.

I told you:)

Knowing is where we find the power…

What the power?

The truth.

and that, my friend….

Is how we set ourselves free:)

via The science behind how emotional distress causes psychosis | Wellness Wordworks.

Therapists revolt against psychiatrys bible – Mental Illness – Salon.com

In Health Care, Hope, Personal empowerment on December 28, 2011 at 5:06 pm

An easy share today….

I’d like to invite you to read this then share it with your health care providers…

Therapists revolt against psychiatrys bible – Mental Illness – Salon.com.

via Therapists revolt against psychiatrys bible – Mental Illness – Salon.com.

Over A Decade of Hindsight – by Mary Maddock

In Hope, Personal empowerment, Pharmaceuticals on December 23, 2011 at 8:50 pm

Mary Maddock today (second from left)

Facebook friend and fellow psychiatric survivor and advocate, Mary Maddock, posted this today on Facebook and gave me permission to share with you here.

You can find Mary at Mindfreedom Ireland by clicking here: www.mindfreedomireland.com

Over a decade of hindsight ( some of the reasons I am drugfree today)

By Mary Maddock

While I was slowly dying from toxic, mindaltering, addictive drugs I was not aware that they were the real cause of my problems.  I was prepared to do foolish things because I was severely cognitively and emotionally impared by extremely longterm multidrug use.  I continued to do this for such a long time because I lived in FEAR.  I was afraid that I would be worse if I stopped my daily  poisonous dose.

One of the main reasons I because drugfree was because Jim became AWARE.   He promised to support me and never to send me to a psychiatric oppresssive prison again.  Then I felt I had the courage to ‘feel the fear and do it anyway!’

While I was on drugs, I was so miserable I cannot believe now how I endured the life I lived then.  Another reason for my freedom was I discovered MindFreedom International, WNUSP, ENUSP and other great organizations.  Then I discovered that many other people were like me and they had become drug free too.  I also discovered outstanding true professionals who spoke out courageously and understood that I was indeed a prescribed drug addict who believed the non scientific ,chemical imbalance theory which was the cause of all the real, adverse effects I was experiencing on my daily dosage.

Hindsight has taught me that it was also very difficult withdrawing and becoming drugfree but the suffering I endured on drugs was tortorous and much, much more horrendous!  Now that I have got over the withdrawal effects my life is FANTASTIC!  THANKS! to all the many people who supported me in making the most important  life choice to become drugfree and still support and encourage me today!   My NewYear’s wish is I hope others will find the support and courage to do the same!

Thank you, Mary, for being the light that you are and sharing your story of hope.

You can find Mary at Mindfreedom Ireland by clicking here: www.mindfreedomireland.com

They lied.

In Hope, Personal empowerment on December 15, 2011 at 10:00 pm

Today I wanted to share a post from the blog, zenhabits.

Leo Babuta is the author of this blog whose tagline ie: main purpose is a simple message….

breath.

One of the messages that we get very often from a variety of sources is that we are not enough.

That we aren’t doing…something….quite

right enough

and that we need to try harder.

In the world of psychiatry and “mental health” this message is especially prominant. We seek “help” looking for answers from those supposedly trained to help us see and understand how to engage with the larger world in a different way than what may be not so helpful and is causing us some sort of distress.

The problem is that somewhere in the past 100 years or so the focus shifted from how can we become more of what is good in us, how can we cultivate our own insights into our shortcomings and become a better us to that of you are broken

defective

disordered

diseased

and in general

pretty fucked up

from the inside 

out.

There is no hope for you now go take your pills and make another appointment. 

So today I wanted to invite you to challenge the idea that you need to be “fixed” and find a place where you can simply be…

and be ok.

In other words….

“they” lied when they told you that your sentence was “for life”.

You are NOT fucked up.

You ARE enough and you are fully capable to create the “you” and the life you want for yourself. 

Read more about learning to let go of the idea that we have to somehow prove ourselves by constantly fixing ourselves at  zenhabits.

You ARE enough and – you “do” just fine:) 

Always grateful we can share the ride:)

Susan

To share your comments click on the RED box that says “No Responses” to get the conversation started:) 

Robert Whitaker slays the critics – Beyond Meds

In Health Care, Hope, Personal empowerment, Robert Whitaker on December 1, 2011 at 2:18 pm

Sharing only today……

Robert Whitaker slays the critics – Beyond Meds.

via Robert Whitaker slays the critics – Beyond Meds.

Thanks for following and reading:)

Susan

Knowledge is Power.

Truth sets us free.

:)

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